My 5 Favorite Lord Of The Rings Characters

I've read the Lord of the Rings trilogy seven times, the Silmarillion three, the Hobbit and Unfinished Tales once each, and watched the movies some dozen-ish times. I'm a pretty big fan, and frankly, if you wanted a list of my favorite characters from Middle-Earth as a whole, including all of the history and what-not, I wouldn't be able to give you one. But here is my list, based on the movie adaptations of the trilogy only, of my five favorite Lord of the Rings characters.

#5 - Samwise Gamgee

How many hobbits does it take to change a lightbulb?

Sam is the nicest guy. Just kinda, period. I mean, Aragorn is a pretty nice guy, as is Legolas, as far as he can be called a guy. But Sam is so honest and good hearted and true and loyal. Also, he's a good cook, and hilarious. But the biggest reason he's on this list is because of Frodo.

In the books, Frodo and Sam are a lot alike. Tolkien kinda has issues separating his characters personalities in general (he was a linguist and world-builder, not a writer), but Frodo and Sam were probably the worst for it. As such, their sections of the books were rather dull. In the movies, efforts are made to differentiate the characters of Frodo and Sam, but what we end up with is a Frodo who's kinda short-tempered, girly, borderline psychotic and a little creepy. You could probably blame the temper and psychosis on the Ring, but the fact remains that if you were to sit down and talk to him for twenty minutes, you'd constantly be wondering whether he had diarrhea or needed to puke, or if maybe he had developed feelings for your shoes.

Sam, on the other hand, gets all the good traits he had before, except in greater amount. This is the only reason I can see for why he stuck with Frodo for all that time, and that's why he's on this list.

Just the one, but clearing away the cobwebs around the fixture can get messy.

#4 – Elrond Half-elvan

Because you haven't seen this picture enough yet.

Elrond doesn't get a huge role in the movies, but I like him even still. Gracious host, sure, but even more than that, Elrond is ancient and wise, and downright incorruptible. The Ring was literally right there, and if we're honest, the hobbits probably would have been more than happy to just let him take it had he simply said “Great job getting it this far, we elves will take it from here.” I mean, you can see Boromir start lusting after the thing about twenty seconds after he sees it. Maybe the fact that he was wearing his own ring of power changes things, but who knows.

Also, he was the one that saw Isildur get the ring, and who dragged him to the top of Mount Doom to destroy it. Had it been me, the second Isildur turned around, gave me a creepy look, and said he wouldn't destroy the ring, I would have cut off his hand and thrown it into the volcano, Ring and all. Or, had I still been standing at the door, like Elrond is shown to be in the movie, I would have called up an archer and had them shoot the short-sighted little human. What I'm getting at here is that Elrond values life and friendship highly, and for that I respect him.

#3 – Eomer

Look, I just use my sister's shampoo. It's convenient. Now stop laughing.

 Fun fact. Eomer doesn't have a last name. Sure, he's the son of Eomund, so I guess that's a surname, but it's never really used the same way we use last names.

Eomer is on this list because Carl Urban gives probably the best holy-crap-my-sister-is-dead performance in Hollywood history. Shoulda won the Oscar (for Best Secondary Supporting Actor Who Is Clearly Upset). Also, he didn't kill Theoden and take the throne when it became clear that his uncle was a puppet of Saruman. I totally would have. I mean... and then supported Theodred's rise to the throne. Because I'm not a power-hungry fiend. Theoden was just clearly not interested in the affairs of Rohan at that point. Yeah. Totally motivated by good will. And just-ness.

ROSEBUD!! OR... SOMETHING!!!

That's it really, though I'm beginning to sense a pattern wherein I like these characters mainly because they were compassionate where I totally would have resorted to violence.

Based on that criteria, and for all you people who are certainly wondering, Aragorn cuts off the head of the Mouth of Sauron when he totally didn't need to. Completely bad-a, something I heartily approve of, and that's why he's not on this list.

#2 – Eowyn

There, see? I'm not sexist. 

It's L'Oreal.

So, basically Eowyn is on here for one reason only.

YIPPEE-KI-YAY MOTHER... ! What was that Peter? Whaddya mean that's not my line?!

I rest my case.

#1 – Gimli

"Holy crap!" - Dwarves worship strange things.

Okay okay, he's not a great philanthropist or anything like that, but Gimli is my favorite character. He's funny, he's loyal, he's motivated, he's realistic, he's got a hilarious accent and likes to eat, drink and carouse. But mostly, despite the racist sentiment imparted by his upbringing, he is able to become friends with an elf.

Hey Legolas, over here! I saved you a seat.

Honorable Mention – Faramir 

Pictured: Faramir being the opposite of helpful and Frodo clearly in need of a restroom break.

Faramir gets this spot here because he's my favorite character from the books. He's all of the good traits Boromir had, minus the weak mind and surrender to the Ring. They kinda ruined that in the movie. And Faramir ends up ruining the Two Towers for me. It's like, the three hours I pretend don't happen between Fellowship and Return of the King. All thanks to Faramir. In the book, he barely even looks at the ring before he sends Frodo and Sam off with packs full of food and a pat on the back. Movie Faramir? Well...

"Wait, Frodo? Something tells me you're not supposed to be here. Oh yeah. Tolkien tells me you're not supposed to be here! PETER! A WORD PLEASE?"