Hans Zimmer's soundtrack paired with a single highly underwhelming review convinced me that I didn't want to see BvS in theaters, and I'm glad that safety net was there. If I had gone to see it in theaters, I wouldn't have been particularly entertained and I would have come away from it with a nasty taste in my mouth for the whole DC Extended Universe ("because Cinematic was already taken"). But since I waited for it to come out on physical media, I've had time to manage my expectations and I was able to enjoy certain aspects of the film. Besides, by this point we've also had Suicide Squad to convince us that DC can listen to their fans.
FANS: "We don't want our superhero movies to be depressing all the time!"
DC: "Reshoots on Suicide Squad! Play up the humor!"
FANS: "We want to have fun watching our superhero movies!"
DC: "Restructure the action in post! Make it light and punchy!"
FANS: "We'd also appreciate a 2016 movie to have more color than a 1926 movie!"
DC: "DROWN THEM IN HUES!"
I haven't seen it yet to say if it worked at all. We'll see how that goes for them.
But what did I think of BvS? We'll call this a review of the Ultimate Edition or whatever they're calling the director's cut, even if I can't compare it directly to the theatrical release. What I can say, based on the several in depth reviews I have since read of the theatrical release, is that despite claims to the contrary, none of the plot holes they said they were going to fix with the Ultimate Edition were actually fixed. They're all still there. So whatever they added, yeah... maybe wasn't worth the extra run time.
But I can't say for sure. Maybe the movie was actually better. I definitely had some issues with it as it was, however. My biggest annoyances are, in order from least to most, as follows. Oh, and in case I needed to say it at this point, ALL THE SPOILERS BELOW.
1) Lex Luthor's big plan to kill Superman is to hold his mother hostage. This demonstrates yet another instance of a Superman villain who has paid jack squat attention to Superman as a force. He cay fly faster than sound, see through pretty much everything (which Lex understood well enough to line a bomb case with lead), can hear people talking a continent away, and is literally bulletproof. If his plan had involved arming the men guarding Superman's mother with kryptonite bullets, that might have made a touch more sense, but he gave all his kryptonite to Batman. It would have taken Supes maybe 30 of the 55 minutes he had left to find his mom, break her out, apprehend Luthor, and turn him in. Maybe Jesse Eisenberg playing Luthor like he's completely unhinged should have been the first tip-off that his plan was going to be idiotic.
2) Superman goes to fight Batman anyway, despite everything I said in that last paragraph. So Superman is an even bigger idiot than Luthor.
3) The lack of color and overall tone of the movie. It's all very sad and hopeless, which seems like a terrible message to be sending to audiences. "The world is an evil place, and even the best, most selfless among us, the superheroes and the politicians who genuinely want to do good, are going to end up manipulated or dead. Also, anyone who sacrifices themselves for the common good may just end up coming back as the bad guy. Have a nice night!" It's like, the opposite of the message behind The Dark Knight, which argued that despite our many flaws, humans are generally good. And I thought THAT movie was depressing...
4) MARTHA!!!
I was just going to leave it at that, but I've got to say this. Who, after stupidly getting themselves into that situation, would with their last breath call out for their mother by her first name? People defend that scene by saying we shouldn't be surprised at convenience in a comic book movie. I think we're all being nasty because no normal person would say that. And don't give me "Superman is an alien," Clark Kent was raised in Kansas. Not Krypton.
Okay, so there were a lot of things I didn't like about this movie, and I will certainly not be buying it. But there were redeeming points. From least redeeming to most redeeming, they are listed below.
A) Wonder Woman. She's least on this list because I ended the movie by thinking "Honestly, that would have been much better if she'd been the main character." But it did get me hopeful for her solo feature coming next year.
B) That whole scene at the beginning that perfectly captured my sense of frustration with the entire finale of Man of Steel. It was thrilling, it was touching, and it was human. I understood Bruce's motivations in the conflict. His were the only motivations in the entire movie that I did understand, so that's maybe a fail overall, but that whole sequence was powerful. And along with that...
C) Affleck's Bruce Wayne/Batman. Best part of the movie? Eh, I like Gal Gadot's Diana better. But I didn't have high hopes for his portrayal, and I was very pleasantly surprised. He sold the performance, his character's motivations and desires, and his plan. I was convinced. He also reminded me that we still haven't really had an actor truly define the character of Batman. Sure, Christian Bale and Michael Keaton were good, but not definitive. So there was alway plenty of room for Affleck to put his own spin on it and be good. And he did. And he was. So well done, Ben. I might forgive you for Daredevil after all.
All in all, I didn't end the movie feeling like I'd wasted my time like I did with Man of Steel. There were good moments, there were bad moments, and in the end they about evened into a flat line of "well, that was certainly a movie." But it did get me a little excited for Wonder Woman and Aquaman to come eventually, so I'll hold out hope for a little longer on the DCEU.
Now what's next? Suicide Squad isn't reviewing particularly well, and... Oh yes. Doctor Strange. Bring it on, MCU. Bring it on.
FANS: "We don't want our superhero movies to be depressing all the time!"
DC: "Reshoots on Suicide Squad! Play up the humor!"
FANS: "We want to have fun watching our superhero movies!"
DC: "Restructure the action in post! Make it light and punchy!"
FANS: "We'd also appreciate a 2016 movie to have more color than a 1926 movie!"
DC: "DROWN THEM IN HUES!"
 |
| You thought that was a joke? That wasn't a joke. |
I haven't seen it yet to say if it worked at all. We'll see how that goes for them.
But what did I think of BvS? We'll call this a review of the Ultimate Edition or whatever they're calling the director's cut, even if I can't compare it directly to the theatrical release. What I can say, based on the several in depth reviews I have since read of the theatrical release, is that despite claims to the contrary, none of the plot holes they said they were going to fix with the Ultimate Edition were actually fixed. They're all still there. So whatever they added, yeah... maybe wasn't worth the extra run time.
But I can't say for sure. Maybe the movie was actually better. I definitely had some issues with it as it was, however. My biggest annoyances are, in order from least to most, as follows. Oh, and in case I needed to say it at this point, ALL THE SPOILERS BELOW.
1) Lex Luthor's big plan to kill Superman is to hold his mother hostage. This demonstrates yet another instance of a Superman villain who has paid jack squat attention to Superman as a force. He cay fly faster than sound, see through pretty much everything (which Lex understood well enough to line a bomb case with lead), can hear people talking a continent away, and is literally bulletproof. If his plan had involved arming the men guarding Superman's mother with kryptonite bullets, that might have made a touch more sense, but he gave all his kryptonite to Batman. It would have taken Supes maybe 30 of the 55 minutes he had left to find his mom, break her out, apprehend Luthor, and turn him in. Maybe Jesse Eisenberg playing Luthor like he's completely unhinged should have been the first tip-off that his plan was going to be idiotic.
2) Superman goes to fight Batman anyway, despite everything I said in that last paragraph. So Superman is an even bigger idiot than Luthor.
3) The lack of color and overall tone of the movie. It's all very sad and hopeless, which seems like a terrible message to be sending to audiences. "The world is an evil place, and even the best, most selfless among us, the superheroes and the politicians who genuinely want to do good, are going to end up manipulated or dead. Also, anyone who sacrifices themselves for the common good may just end up coming back as the bad guy. Have a nice night!" It's like, the opposite of the message behind The Dark Knight, which argued that despite our many flaws, humans are generally good. And I thought THAT movie was depressing...
4) MARTHA!!!
I was just going to leave it at that, but I've got to say this. Who, after stupidly getting themselves into that situation, would with their last breath call out for their mother by her first name? People defend that scene by saying we shouldn't be surprised at convenience in a comic book movie. I think we're all being nasty because no normal person would say that. And don't give me "Superman is an alien," Clark Kent was raised in Kansas. Not Krypton.
Okay, so there were a lot of things I didn't like about this movie, and I will certainly not be buying it. But there were redeeming points. From least redeeming to most redeeming, they are listed below.
A) Wonder Woman. She's least on this list because I ended the movie by thinking "Honestly, that would have been much better if she'd been the main character." But it did get me hopeful for her solo feature coming next year.
B) That whole scene at the beginning that perfectly captured my sense of frustration with the entire finale of Man of Steel. It was thrilling, it was touching, and it was human. I understood Bruce's motivations in the conflict. His were the only motivations in the entire movie that I did understand, so that's maybe a fail overall, but that whole sequence was powerful. And along with that...
C) Affleck's Bruce Wayne/Batman. Best part of the movie? Eh, I like Gal Gadot's Diana better. But I didn't have high hopes for his portrayal, and I was very pleasantly surprised. He sold the performance, his character's motivations and desires, and his plan. I was convinced. He also reminded me that we still haven't really had an actor truly define the character of Batman. Sure, Christian Bale and Michael Keaton were good, but not definitive. So there was alway plenty of room for Affleck to put his own spin on it and be good. And he did. And he was. So well done, Ben. I might forgive you for Daredevil after all.
All in all, I didn't end the movie feeling like I'd wasted my time like I did with Man of Steel. There were good moments, there were bad moments, and in the end they about evened into a flat line of "well, that was certainly a movie." But it did get me a little excited for Wonder Woman and Aquaman to come eventually, so I'll hold out hope for a little longer on the DCEU.
Now what's next? Suicide Squad isn't reviewing particularly well, and... Oh yes. Doctor Strange. Bring it on, MCU. Bring it on.
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