Hey all, uh... here's a rabbit hole for you.
Video game movie adaptations have a long and storied and rather deep and nasty, damp, and slimy and sorta stinky, scratch that, really stinky in a the-sewers-that-empty-souls-into-the-Stygian-mire-on-their-way-to-hell sort of from-the-depths-style history in Hollywood. There are the early stinkers, like Super Mario Bros.' post-apocalyptic steam-punk-fantasy take on a plumber getting high and stepping on turtles, and upcoming stinkers, such as Sonic the Hedgehog's art director's inability to, like, see the source material (which seemingly has been corrected by the internet). Inside that festering pile of Bowser crap you find such turd-nuggets as Street Fighter, DOOM, Mortal Kombat: Annihilation, The Cradle of Life, Need for Speed, Hitman... the list goes on. It's a cesspool of tone-deaf producers, writers, and directors that are completely disconnected from their audience.
In short, video game adaptations, on average, suck. Like, way more than your average blockbuster. Book adaptations have a pretty bad rap, in general, but fans of literature have no idea the depths of misery video game fans have been dragged through by the people responsible for adapting their favorite source material.
So, here I am to not talk about that at all! Because while yeah, generally speaking you can expect Hollywood to adapt your favorite video game into a milk jug filled with vomit, there are actually a few video game adaptations that weren't completely awful. Like, painful to watch. So painful it actually felt like you were drinking that milk jug... uh, you know what, let's just uh... leave that metaphor alone.
Here are five video game adaptations that were, at least, watchable blockbusters.
Note: It's probably worth mentioning that I haven't seen every video game adaptation ever. They sit on a spectrum, and based on popular opinion among gamers and movie-people (is there a colloquial term for that? Filmies, I guess?) I have seen most of the best and worst ones. But that's not gonna stop me from writing this list, because I'm on the internet, and you can't control me!
Video game movie adaptations have a long and storied and rather deep and nasty, damp, and slimy and sorta stinky, scratch that, really stinky in a the-sewers-that-empty-souls-into-the-Stygian-mire-on-their-way-to-hell sort of from-the-depths-style history in Hollywood. There are the early stinkers, like Super Mario Bros.' post-apocalyptic steam-punk-fantasy take on a plumber getting high and stepping on turtles, and upcoming stinkers, such as Sonic the Hedgehog's art director's inability to, like, see the source material (which seemingly has been corrected by the internet). Inside that festering pile of Bowser crap you find such turd-nuggets as Street Fighter, DOOM, Mortal Kombat: Annihilation, The Cradle of Life, Need for Speed, Hitman... the list goes on. It's a cesspool of tone-deaf producers, writers, and directors that are completely disconnected from their audience.
In short, video game adaptations, on average, suck. Like, way more than your average blockbuster. Book adaptations have a pretty bad rap, in general, but fans of literature have no idea the depths of misery video game fans have been dragged through by the people responsible for adapting their favorite source material.
So, here I am to not talk about that at all! Because while yeah, generally speaking you can expect Hollywood to adapt your favorite video game into a milk jug filled with vomit, there are actually a few video game adaptations that weren't completely awful. Like, painful to watch. So painful it actually felt like you were drinking that milk jug... uh, you know what, let's just uh... leave that metaphor alone.
Here are five video game adaptations that were, at least, watchable blockbusters.
Note: It's probably worth mentioning that I haven't seen every video game adaptation ever. They sit on a spectrum, and based on popular opinion among gamers and movie-people (is there a colloquial term for that? Filmies, I guess?) I have seen most of the best and worst ones. But that's not gonna stop me from writing this list, because I'm on the internet, and you can't control me!
Rampage
This is not a great movie, don't get me wrong. I've reviewed it on this blog before, so you can go read my full thoughts there. But suffice it to say, this movie gets the majority of 'blockbuster building blocks' right, and the places it fails it manages not to fail so hard the rest of the movie becomes unwatchable. In particular, the giant CG ape is simply fantastic, and the visuals in general are great. As Dwayne "The Protein" Johnson's second attempt at a video game movie after DOOM, Rampage is a solid "yeah, you could rent this and not feel betrayed".Tomb Raider
I've already reviewed this as well, so you can totally go read my full thoughts there. In short, this movie is a fine action-adventure film, and manages to squeak in at about the middle of the Indiana Jones franchise in terms of overall quality and entertainment values. It was better than the Angelina Jolie film, which... I mean, that was made in the 90's, so to say it was "tone-deaf" is a little inaccurate, just... deafening? Yeah, that's probably it. But the remake is a solid action film with a good lead played by a good actor and some really nice set-piece moments. It doesn't live up to the full potential of its source material, sure, but then neither did the last Tomb Raider game, so uh... not a bad look for Hollywood for once.
Resident Evil
I'm kinda lumping the whole franchise together here, because all of the Resident Evil movies are roughly similar in quality, though as an adaptation of a survival-horror game, I would say the first one is probably the most true to the concept. These are action-horror movies built on zombie film tropes that borrow heavily from the situational insanity that lends the games a lot of their signature flavor. They're pretty good for action-based horror, even if their regard for continuity isn't... well, there. But they managed to get enough of a following to justify six whole movies where most adaptations bomb hard enough in theaters they never even get one sequel. So credit where credit is due, even though the intersection of "survival-horror game fan" and "slasher-horror movie fan" is small enough that a lot of people will never watch any of these.Prince of Persia
Look, it's a good blockbuster. For proof you need look no further than stuff like Independence Day: Resurgence and Battleship. Prince of Persia is a swashbuckling adventure film that borrows heavily from the acrobatic action and scenery of the original game while making what I consider the proper choice to just invent its plot out of whole-cloth. It's paced quickly enough to keep viewers from falling asleep, and the character writing, plot points, and relationships on screen are all good enough to keep from introducing massive amounts of cringe. The acting is actually pretty good, the music is one of Harry Gregson-Williams' best scores, and the action is a blast. This was possibly the first real parkour-inspired action movie I ever saw, and I just love the style. So much fun to watch.Warcraft
Hey now, a quarter of the world's population can't all be wrong. This movie exploded in Asia, and I think the way it under-performed in the US is criminal. It's got loads of flaws, of course, but there are a lot of very positive things going on here. Does it hold up well versus The Lord of the Rings? Heck no! But it's not nearly as bad as everyone said it was. If nothing else, here's the takeaway. Warcraft has better creature design and makeup throughout than the huge CGI moments of Avengers: Endgame, and the character animation is on-par with the best moments Endgame or Alita: Battle Angel have to offer, despite being three years older. This movie could have been sooooo much worse.Detective Pikachu
Whoa! Six?? Wha... who made this list!!
Well, whatever. I'm not going to complain because finally we've gotten to a movie that I don't feel like I have to justify liking. Up to this point the best I could really say about any video game adaptation was "it's entertaining despite its flaws". Which is decidedly middle of the line for most movies, but Detective Pikachu is, legitimately, a good movie, rather than just being a good movie for Pokèmon fans. The pokèmon themselves are excellently designed and animated (ARE YOU WATCHING SONIC ANIMATORS), the story is compelling, touching, and well paced, and the script and characters are all well written. Perhaps the highlight of the movie is the casting and performances, because Ryan Reynolds and Justice Smith are fantastic in their parts. It's got a few issues, but generally the whole production is super high quality, and means that, finally, we've got a video game movie I can whole-heartedly recommend.
Aaaand Sonic is coming out sometime in the next six months, so let's see how long that streak lasts, exactly.
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